#Download gay emotional professional#
Now that you have identified the void (thoughts, beliefs, missing emotions, pain, hurt, trauma and origins) seek out a professional who has a process to help you safely and effectively shift your subconscious perspective of the origins of the emotional void. This is also a key antidote if you uncover feelings of shame.įilling the void with distractions and other destructive or self-sabotaging behavior only creates more problems and pain. Remember, you have been running away from your emotions and now is the time to heal and conquer. read to that person what you have written so far in the above suggested exercises. And although, you might say you feel nothing, now write out or list any past pains, hurts, disappointments, rejections, losses or traumas these are your gateway to the origins of the emotional void.Ĭhoose a person you can trust, someone who is accepting and share your experience and perspectives i.e. In step 2, I suggested writing out what you are feeling. Give attention to the ways that you have been failing to respect yourself and allowing others to take advantage of you or the ways you have become excessively attached to something or someone. How have you been filling the void up until now – excessive food, drugs, sex, work, studying, exercise, video games, online surfing, people-pleasing, taking care of others, rescuing, being victimized, being controlled, etc.? Note all the ways that you distract yourself and avoid actually feeling something. The courage to accept despair becomes the courage to be.” ― Michael Novak, Experience of Nothingness “In the nothingness, one has at last an opportunity to shape one’s own identity, to create oneself. And if all you can write in this step is “empty, numb, nothing, etc.” that is okay. Write out what you are feeling or list which emotions you feel are missing. I defined an emotional void as the empty space that lacks meaningful emotion. I regret doing it, but I’ll turn around and do it again.” – Janet Jacksonīegin by admitting to yourself (and to people that care) that you have an emotional void. “When I’m feeling down on myself or not feeling good about who I am, or maybe something happened and I’m feeling depressed, I eat to fill that void. Also, when we fail to consciously face our emotional void, there is a good chance that we will be controlled by others or taken advantage of as we seek to fill that void in all the wrong ways, wrong places and with the wrong people. we will engage in self-destructive behavior such as drugs, alcohol, unhealthy eating patterns, obsessive behavior, recklessness, etc. If we choose to not face the void, find its origin and heal it, then we will most likely fill the void with all the wrong things i.e.
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In other words, most of the emotional voids we experience as adults are the result of not having our emotional needs satisfied when we were children. When those needs are not met in childhood, there will be emotional voids in adulthood. When those needs are not met, we experience an emotional void.Ĭhildren, however, have many more additional needs – attention, physical touch & affection, to be seen and heard (feeling visible, significant and understood), validation, praise, direction, encouragement, acceptance, approval, belonging, quantity and quality time, and so forth.
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Generally speaking, we have 6 human emotional needs – love & connection, challenges, security, significance, growth, meaning & purpose. “Today, the experience of nothingness is simply a fact: many of us have it… what shall I do with it?” ― Michael Novak, Experience of Nothingness Some people experience emotional voids with negative thoughts, ruminations and racing thoughts. Now, let’s talk about 7 steps to fill that emotional void.Īn emotional void is the empty space that lacks meaningful emotion.Īn emotional void can be described various ways – numbness, a sense of nothingness, lack of excitement, lack of purpose, hopelessness, isolation, and feelings of being disconnected, lost or confused.